Supersonic Mom Ears

15 May

First of all, why do babies fight sleep?  Don’t they know that one day they will do anything for an extra 5 minutes?  Chloe took a good nap this morning and then decided that sleep was totally overrated.  I finally got her down.

What I really wanted to talk about is my new superpower.  I can hear everything.  Our house makes a billion noises I bet no one else has ever heard.  

This “power” manifested itself during my pregnancy as a deep intolerance for Hunter’s breathing at night.  It never bothered me before but suddenly I couldn’t stand it. I started sleeping with a pillow on my head and then progressed to ear plugs.  I felt like I was sleeping with Darth Vader.

He didn’t believe me, so I recorded him with my phone one night.  Hilarious, yes.  Helpful, no.  

The ear plugs worked until Chloe came.  Then, ear plugs were no longer an option.  I needed to be able to hear her from down the hall.  Which I can.  All the time.  She scoots, I hear her.  She starts sucking her thumb, I wake up (Although admittedly, when she’s sleepy and sucking her thumb it’s more of slurping her thumb.).

I say all of this to tell you about last night.  Chloe was stirring, Hunter was breathing (how dare he, haha) and I was awake.  Suddenly, I hear something scurrying around on our roof.  Not scurrying really, but running around like crazy, trying to get in the gutters, occasionally jumping.  I could hear it clear as day.  I woke Hunter up so he wouldn’t think I’m nuts and he could barely hear it.  We’re pretty sure it was a raccoon because we saw one running on our neighbors roof last week. What would a raccoon want on a roof?  Who knows.

Will my ears ever calm down?  Will I be able to sleep soundly without being interrupted by ants scurrying across the ground outside two houses away?  Moms?  Anyone?

And now I’m off to dream of Jon Hamm watch Mad Men and hopefully get some uninterrupted sleep.


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